Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles
And by opposing end them.
Hamlet was a whiner, tis true.
I have a coworker who wears the same size shoes as I, who has offered before to sell me shoes that she purchased via the internet that turned out to not fit her. I declined because I know I have a shoe “thing” (not an obsession but a tendency to collect them and never wear them) and the particular pair she offered was not that attractive. This time, she offered me a cute pair and I tried them on and they seemed to fit well and so I took them – she said she got them for $40 and she’d sell them to me for $20. I guess somewhere in the exchange I assumed that they were new.
So I paid her after pay day happened – to which she didn’t say ‘Thanks’ but that’s the way of the world these days.
Then I wore them this morning and noticed that they are not as comfortable as I thought. So, maybe this pair will be going to charity. “Waste of money?” Maybe.
I changed shoes for the treadmill, and when I changed back I noticed a bandage around one of the straps and I thought “hmm. Maybe it rubbed her there – obviously she wore them enough to know that it rubbed.” I removed the bandage. Then the strap came apart.
“Oh! She wore them enough to break them. Thus, these are not new. What a waste of money.”
So, I couldn’t help myself. I got a little annoyed and I thought “What type of person sells broken shoes to a coworker – someone she sees everyday? If she’s that desperate for $20, I could have just given her $20 and had the same result. Maybe she thinks I’m simple?”
Do I complain to the coworker?
Do I suck it up because I should have noticed and asked about the bandage when I examined the shoes the first time?
Do I just ignore it and move on?
Do I dwell on these questions and write a blog post? (ha!)
So – what’s the lesson here? Mindfulness of course. Pay attention to what you are doing. Ask questions. One question, what would confronting the person do? Nothing but make us both uncomfortable. What would doing nothing do? Nothing but make me write a blog post (something I should do anyway). I was resigned to giving up the shoes anyway, so now I’m either going to fix them with thread/needle/super glue when I get home and then give them to charity, or I’m going to toss them. Will I trust this person again? No. Will I purchase shoes from her again? No. Do I hold anger against her? It’s fading in to sorrow (and bypassing the slings and arrows).
Second lesson – I’m simple. I’m okay with that.
Third lesson – I don’t need shoes obviously.